You know, I have so many flippin’ entries that are saved to draft form. I really should get on those. Instead, I find myself writing about an odd occurrence that happened this morning. I’ve blogged here, before, about odd occurrences with Papa Legba and Papa Ghede. Perhaps it was just time for something odd to happen with Sekhmet. Anyone who follows my Twitter feed or is friends with me on FB will have possibly seen this prior to this entry being written. However, the instance belongs here with all of my other little strange experiences.
So, at about five-thirty this morning, my son woke me up with another attack of random puking. (This has been going on for a little over a week now: he’ll throw up once a day, if that, and then he’s fine for the rest of the time. It’s so strange!) He had climbed into bed with me earlier for whatever reason—probably sensing that his belly was upset—so it was a quick wake up call. We managed to get everything situated for him on the couch. I got him his throw up bowl. I had him all settled down and comfortable while he watched early morning cartoons on Nickelodeon. After about an hour after he initially woke me up, I couldn’t stand to be awake any longer and went roaming back into my room for some catch up shut-eye. This is when it gets weird.
I decided I needed to contact Sekhmet. I had, initially, intended on cleaning and sanitizing the altar space she’s on yesterday, but for whatever reason, I didn’t get to it. (I had decided to wait until my son is 100% back to normal before I do all of that and mayhap, I knew subconsciously that he wasn’t back to himself entirely.) So, I closed my eyes and pictured her as best I could. During times like these, as I’ve done this a time or two before, I try to envision the woman with the lion’s head. However, more often than not, I tend to view her as a beautiful woman with a woman’s face and long black hair that falls either to her shoulders, to her mid-back, or to her waist. Since I couldn’t see her with the lion’s face, I decided to just keep going with it. It felt like Sekhmet; we were walking in the desert as we usually do when I try to connect with her like this. But, my mind kept wandering…
…to TEHNOVEL that I’ve been working on since 2004. (OMGz. That long?!)
I’ve let the work sit down and lie fallow for over a year now. For a long while, the muse block was stemming from work. After being promoted to manager at that horrific hell hole, I couldn’t do much more than come home from work and clean the house, make sure something was eaten, before crashing for the night to do it all over again. Even on my “early” days, I was intensely busy with something related to the store that I was working in, so writing was put on the back burner. With my abrupt departure due to lies and bullshit, I found an easier and bigger block than the one that work had caused: DEPRESSION. During this period, I thought periodically about how I should probably get going on that thing since it’s been sitting in limbo for so long, but nothing ever came of it. (I’ll be honest: most of the time that I’ve thought about getting my written work finished and pushed out there is in relation to reading other friends of mine getting their books published. Shameless promotions: Bellica by Katje Van Loon and The Traveller’s Guide to the Duat by Kiya Nicoll!!!!)
As I started writing things in my mind’s eye, I consciously knew what was going on. I didn’t quite understand the reason behind it (still don’t, really) but I could understand why I was thinking about my book after contacting Sekhmet. You see, nominally, she’s in it. (Talk about using the things you know in love in your writing, huh? HUH?!?!?) And I have a kind of series of books in my head about this series in which Sekhmet becomes more and more a prominent character. The first “writing” session in my head after making contact with my patron was a scene that she was in. I thought it might have to be added to the WIP I have now* or perhaps in the next novel of the series. Then, I started flitting towards a basic issue I was having with a major plot device before fixing that. And then, I was focusing on a personal conversation between the antagonist and her best friend about why the antagonist is such a bitch about things…
(* I call it the WIP, although I have to say that it is done. The problems, however, are that certain characters weren’t written as smoothly or I didn’t like them as much as I thought I would. So, I’ve had to re-write certain characters. I’ve also had issues with certain areas feeling a little too rushed and a little too choppy. This is actually where I am now: choppiness.)
All of the things I had focused on in this quasi-dream state were issues that I’ve had. And I kept writing and writing scenes in my head. I came fully awake at one point and started lamenting the fact that I didn’t have my Moleskine anymore (which is where I used to write random tidbits that would come to mind when I was nowhere near the WIP). Then, I thought things would be way better if someone would create machinery that would let you write just by thinking so that, even in a quasi-dream state, the words would be remembered in the morning.
Suffice it to say, I can only remember the major plot device issue being corrected and the conversation between the best friends. I know there was more and I know that a conversation with the Sekhmet character will happen (IN WHICH BOOK, DAMNIT?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?) but there was a lot more that I’ve since forgotten. Sadly. I bet it was all good stuff, too.
This is all very odd to me, though. I’ve never connected Sekhmet with TEHNOVEL before. Sure, she’s in it. However, she doesn’t have an honest-to-goddess character at the moment. She’s something I’ve been using to further the plot as time has gone by. This is really the first time that I’ve felt that there really was a connection. And that, to me, is kind of weird.
In all honesty, I’m not really sure I know what this means… besides me having to get my ass in gear and just fucking do what I have to do. …Yeah. Let’s see how long this lasts.