I am overly ambitious in the realm of my religion. I think a part of this is due to the fact that I grew up in a Catholic church. Everything was rich and gold and in-your-face and exuberant and huge. It was all completely over-the-top so that, I think, is what I assume all religious practices to be. I’m not sure if this is honestly the case. This is merely a simple, possible explanation for my constant “I need this and this and this and OMG WHERE IS THE MONEY THAT DOESN’T EXIST FOR ALL OF THIS GOING TO COME FROM?”
I found a website via Kemetic Orthodoxy that sells natron and kapet incense and bath oils/salts/something and everything. However, the products are entirely affiliated with the Kemetic Orthodox movement and this makes me leery. All descriptions say something about how the Nisut has blessed such-and-such a product or hand-crafted it herself and then blessed it. I bite my lip in temptation, but I also have to wonder if I should go ahead and seriously think about buying these things. I mean, after all, I am not a person of that specific faith and I hold no serious belief that the Nisut blessing is necessary for such things. I think most reconstructionists of my ilk would agree.
(Note: I’m not saying that the KO path is the wrong one or that I think it’s silly or anything. I just don’t hold with it, is all.)
I think I may have found a handy solution for a kar-shrine however. I was doing random searches for kar-shrines and happened to notice that the images of such were usually of cabinetry. So, I thought maybe I should get a TV armoire, like those you would find in a bedroom, for my shrine. However, after a serious problem with my son trying to play with my altar, I realized that I need to have the shrine out of his way so that he can’t open it. Voila! The idea hit me: How about a wall cabinet that like those found in bathrooms? And I think I found one. I want to paint it, although I don’t know if I should paint it in gold since it will be in my bedroom and, one day, my bedroom will be of an ancient Egyptian bend or if I should paint it blue and cover it in stars like images of Nut are shown…
So many ideas! And they are all so grandiose. I have big dreams, baby, but I don’t know how to see them come about.
I think the answer to kapet and natron is simply that I should make my own. I finally bought the loudly-touted book by Lise Manniche that everyone who is anyone in the KR path talks about. I had to buy a used copy because the re-produced current version is fifty dollars on its own. That just doesn’t fly with me because, if it only costs me twenty at a used price, that means that I can buy a few more books before I hit my magic mark! So, I bought a couple of other highly recommended books.
On that note, I should thank The Sister because it was her perseverance in buying her books that made me realize I need more for my personal edification. I knew that I needed the books, but I put it off for this and for that. I was thinking of big, personal changes when really, I should have been eyeballing her and realizing that, yes a new wardrobe would be nice, but really, I need to change the inside before the outside can follow suit. (And you know, diet again.)
So, personal learning comes before everything else.
And even though my ideas and thoughts on the whole thing are big and in-your-face and grandiose and I want to do them all RIGHT NOW. I realize that I have to wait. Everything takes time. My biggest sin is that I am greatly impatient. I will try to remember that impatience leads to many things and never any of it any good.